"Sometimes people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."
"He who has power has merely convinced others that they have none." - Ari
"Anyone can get hit by a moving car. It takes skill to get hit by a parked car."
"Friends are like potato chips... if you eat them, they die."
"Let's eat Dad. Let's eat, Dad. PUNCTUATION SAVES LIVES!"
"The awkward moment when you've already said "what?" three times and still have no idea what the person said, so you just agree."
"My friend's name is Jay, but I call him J for short."
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